Just rambling

I read a cousins blog this morning that caused me to reflect on my own life. We can't go back and change the past, we can only make the future better. Sometimes that is easier said than done. Human nature takes us back with regrets about the things we didn't do and rids us with guilt. If there were only a sure fire method to make it go away. I wish that I had spent more time with Whitney laughing and enjoying the small things, spending more time listening and less time yelling. Those 16 years she lived at home flew by, and I hope that despite the bad times, that there were some good things for her to remember. Now she been married for 14 months, has 2 babies and a life of her own. I guess I feel jipped that I didn't get to enjoy more time with her, being able to watch her go to her first dance, teach her to drive, wait up for her after a date and then talk till wee hours of the morning. We still talk, she'll share things about school and other events happening. I am proud of her for sticking to the end and finishing high school, she'll graduate in June. Plus she'll have her CNA. Now I get to enjoy my precious grandchildren, and see life through their eyes, and they bring me so much joy. I need to make it better for Scott, I get so stressed out with him. He's 12, pre-teen and all that goes with it. He tells me that I forgot how to laugh at things. He's always trying to be a clown. I guess that I have forgot about the small and simple things of life. I have a great husband who provides for our family, gives me support in PTA and other things I do. I guess I need to work harder on enjoying the simple things in life, not getting so stressed out, and finding the good in each day, even when it's in the middle of a snow storm (which I'm tired of). I don't want to have Scott leave and have the same regrets all over again, and not being able to do anything about. At his age spending time with family is the last thing he wants to do, it's being with friends. I just have to make sure they are good friends. Life is a learning process, and it can take our whole life to figure it out. I just hope I can figure it out before it's full of regrets again.